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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2012 21:20:18 GMT -5
a pre-op asked me this - since I told her I COULD over eat, now that I am over 3 years out. she wants to know why I don't, then, when I did before.
I have a surgery that provides restriction only - and I know I could eat around it. so why don't I?
it's a hard question to answer fully right off. I will think about it, is what I'm saying.
my gut feeling right off is that now I know it is possible to live at this weight. I never thought it was possible to get down to my goal and I did. I now believe I can stay here, even if it takes more effort as I get further out.
meanwhile, I'd like to hear what everyone else has to say.
but, please don't say "I CAN'T over eat" because I am pretty sure that at some time, you will be able to. you have to continue to choose not to.
but I do not see this as being on a diet. really doesn't feel like that.
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Post by loulou7 on Feb 1, 2012 21:28:54 GMT -5
I'm just now realizing that I CAN overeat, and I CAN hold a lot more than I could even six months ago.
And it's a lot easier to pack in crackers and bread than I ever thought it would be. If I really set my mind to it, I could put away an entire tube of ritz crackers....
While I don't have the ravenous, constant hunger that I had pre-surgery, I still like to nibble, graze, keep going back for one more bite.
So....the choice I have to make over and over again is whether I eat what and when I want, or if I use the knowledge I have and stick to the basics....proteins and veggies first, no liquid calories, no grazing.....no packing in the carbs just because there is room for another cracker.
So....mindful eating. Making mindful choices, and not just making one good choice occasionally. Making good choices ALMOST ALL THE TIME. It doesn't feel like being on a diet, like being deprived. But making good eating choices is definitely harder than just grabbing the nearest food and shoving it into my pie hole.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2012 22:14:31 GMT -5
I knew it would help me, seeing someone else post about this.
there are those months - quite a few for me - where you really CAN'T over eat without pain.
I was keeping track and getting in my protein because I was afraid not to for my health. and that didn't leave any room.
so you get practice KNOWING you can get along without using food for soothing yourself or relaxing or for avoiding something or to deal with boredom or whatever.
and then, when I have since gone back to trying to use food for all that - I realize it doesn't work. I mean, it does NOT work.
so there's that. you do have to do the Head Stuff - but you get some time to practice.
and shopping for new clothes turns out to be more fun than over eating.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2012 22:18:07 GMT -5
by the way, I can eat FOUR sleeves of Ritz. I can. not all at once but over, say, half a day.
turns out it makes me feel loggy so I would rather not do it. but I don't say, no more Ritz ever. I say Ritz only for special occasions. not for every weekend!
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Post by Avonlea on Feb 1, 2012 22:20:58 GMT -5
I know that the VSG is considered restrictive-only, but I really do believe that there is a hormonal aspect that makes it different from other restrictive-only procedures. The loss of grehlin (which seems to be pretty permanent, at least as far as the more recent studies go) must have some sort of effect.
I don't think it's only the restriction. I think it is a change in brain and body chemistry that allows lower-calorie, higher protein eating on a permanent basis.
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Post by michellemj on Feb 1, 2012 22:29:32 GMT -5
I agree with lou. It comes down to making correct choices. I'm 15-16 months out. and while I can't eat everything in the world, I can eat pretty much some of whatever I want.
I should lose at least 10-15 more pounds. But I don't know if I ever will. Personally, I'm happy with where I am. I wear a size 6/8 and that's fine, regardless if I don't have that magic 24 BMI.
In the end, I had the surgery to fix me. and prevent the horrible future I was looking at. My father is SMO. and has significant cardiac issues. and has had a double knee replacement.
At some point I decided I didn't want that life and I was willing to do whatever to avoid it. I don't feel deprived. I don't miss my pasta filled life and if I want a bite or two of pasta, I do it. Whatever.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2012 22:33:06 GMT -5
edited to add, this post is in reply to Avonlea.
that may be true, or only temporarily - I'm not sure. I do have what I consider normal hunger again. but eating too much because of hunger was never my problem!
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2012 23:55:11 GMT -5
a pre-op asked me this - since I told her I COULD over eat, now that I am over 3 years out. she wants to know why I don't, then, when I did before. I have a surgery that provides restriction only - and I know I could eat around it. so why don't I? it's a hard question to answer fully right off. I will think about it, is what I'm saying. my gut feeling right off is that now I know it is possible to live at this weight. I never thought it was possible to get down to my goal and I did. I now believe I can stay here, even if it takes more effort as I get further out. meanwhile, I'd like to hear what everyone else has to say. but, please don't say "I CAN'T over eat" because I am pretty sure that at some time, you will be able to. you have to continue to choose not to. but I do not see this as being on a diet. really doesn't feel like that. Likely disjointed ramblings following, time for bed.. Oh god. I know I could overeat right now, I can pack in the calories easily.. and sometimes my hunger and or cravings tells me it's just exactly what I should be doing.. The difference this surgery is currently giving me is time to think about it, in that moment.. just a little time. Before, it would be instinctual, now- not only do I have to make more of an effort to continue nibbling when/if I start.. and I can start many times during the day if I wanted and there's the downfall and the plus. Every time I get the urge to eat I have a moment I can check myself. I have more time to judge where it's coming from, what I may really need more than food, and I make a decision whether I wish to continue eating.. The hormonal assist I had early on faded at mo 4-6. I now have hunger, and cravings. It's purely a head game with a helping hand of a smaller receptacle. The stomach gets empty faster, so walking the line between mini-meals and grazing is also a challenge at times. I am still a foodie, still have a fat tooth.. but a. I have a much reduced capacity so I now feel satisfaction, however I realize that DOES NOT fix grazing at all, and 2. I have adapted to a very low carb life, and I rather enjoy it (same here, doesn't feel like a "diet".. but that doesn't mean I give myself free reign to indulge every desire..) It totally a readjusting of behaviors time. I know boxing many of the junkiest carbs out save for special occasion is necessary for me. Ritz crackers & me cannot abide together, or cheesy poufs (have not had since pre-op.. but I betcha I could eat a bag in an afternoon..) This question does make you think.
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Post by michellemj on Feb 2, 2012 8:40:30 GMT -5
I know that the VSG is considered restrictive-only, but I really do believe that there is a hormonal aspect that makes it different from other restrictive-only procedures. The loss of grehlin (which seems to be pretty permanent, at least as far as the more recent studies go) must have some sort of effect. I don't think it's only the restriction. I think it is a change in brain and body chemistry that allows lower-calorie, higher protein eating on a permanent basis. I don't know if that's necessarily true...I never really lost my hunger. It's not mind numbing and it can be quelled with much less food than before, but I still get HUNGRY and often. and I also know that if given the poor choice, I can pack a crapton of carbs in my sleeve like chips and crackers. There are just some foods that just can't enter my house. I choose protein first. I don't miss the other stuff once I eat my protein. Getting rid of my stomach helped that. and I'm quite thankful.
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Post by Brandilynn on Feb 2, 2012 11:24:03 GMT -5
{brandi ramble on/}
I also still get hungry, my hunger was never all gone and ABSOLUTELY could eat a few sleeves O crackers. I wouldnt even need to spread it out all day, you buncha quitter/non tryers. :} But my hunger is not that panicked hunger, tis like a regular hunger *I think??* would feel.
I also have my house as my safe place. Stuff that I dont/wont make good decisions about dont get eaten here except on a VERY RARE occasion, like my Spring party, but all leftovers are destroyed and have caustic something poured on them and go out in the big bin before I go to bed. Cant shit a shitter. I will make excuses all day long and "finish" them. This is the way I set me up for success. My willpower, depending on MANY things has a varied window.
I think not eating a lot of the foods that made me their bitch before here in my home really helps, because its not in my pattern that I have them here.
As far as being "deprived" I eat foods I love and that are nutritionally dense. I will, at functions, have foods that I would make poor choices about if they were consistently in my life/home and enjoy them mightily there.
Its food. I have had it before. I can have it again. REAL deprivation to me? Going back to being in consistent chronic pain because I was wearing so much of me, having to buy clothes just because they FIT, not because I liked them, being distracted by myself in wonderful family pictures or even staying out of them because I was distracted by me, being ashamed that I couldnt/wouldnt keep the promise to me to take care of myself.
THAT to me is deprivation. And for some folks, I think deprivation is not being mobile or even being able to wipe their own asses.
Food will always be there, I have reframed what deprivation is to me, and it isnt about the foods. Its about being able to be relatively pain free and comfortable in my skin.
Also, the lessening of the hunger helped me to have room between a triggery point and my acting on stuffing my face with foods that would change my mood/body chemistry. I had ROOM to use all those tools that I had been learning and practicing and was just overwhelmed by panicked urgent hunger, and then being bummed out by me and my inabiltiy to bootstrap it, yet again.
I will, annoyingly say, I risked my life and my relationship with my husband to get this surgery. If I wasnt willing to look at the things I do to sabotage myself or the poor habits that I had made, if I wasnt willing to dump my excuses and do hard work - then those risks wouldnt have been worth it.
But they have been to this point. And I too, am thankful, even when I get to drink 3 shakes a day to keep my protein up and wanna jam sticks in people's eyes who whine about the horrors of having to gag down 1 or 2 shakes a day. Shit honey, I have willingly put some nasty shit in my mouth. Protein shakes are the least of these. :}
Damn, edit to add - I guess the "diet" thing bugs me when folks get all up in arms, but I guess I have reframed what "diet" means - it just means "what I eat that serves me well."
{/brandi ramble}
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Janis
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Post by Janis on Feb 2, 2012 12:09:15 GMT -5
Hi,
I'm Janis. I'm the no op/pre op Jackie mentioned in her original post. Thanks so much for everyone's thoughtful input and frankness.
Not much of my current overeating is driven by true hunger. I often eat by the clock or for other reasons so I seldom get to the point of hunger.
I am considering surgery but I'm trying to be realistic about myself and my food related behaviors. I've been around on surgery boards long enough to know that the honeymoon passes and then the work of maintaining begins. It is good to hear that with work it is possible.
Thanks again, Janis
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Post by Brandilynn on Feb 2, 2012 12:15:07 GMT -5
Hi, I'm Janis. I'm the no op/pre op Jackie mentioned in her original post. Thanks so much for everyone's thoughtful input and frankness. Not much of my current overeating is driven by true hunger. I often eat by the clock or for other reasons so I seldom get to the point of hunger. I am considering surgery but I'm trying to be realistic about myself and my food related behaviors. I've been around on surgery boards long enough to know that the honeymoon passes and then the work of maintaining begins. It is good to hear that with work it is possible. Thanks again, Janis Hey MzJanis, For me the hunger AND bad habits that were just my pattern and maybe not *knowing* how to "do" moderation were all just hand in hand. This book was REALLY helpful for me to learn how to set myself up for success with structure. It helped me see foods that I could not/would not make good choices with and did I need to box them out of my life forever, or box them in for special times, or what! books.google.com/books?id=Nl2bfrlGW4AC&lpg=PR1&ots=FrkuEEWBTi&dq=%22thin%20commandments%22&pg=PR4#v=onepage&q&f=false That is the actual book, not just a link to buy it. He has a diet in the back, but its much too carby for the likes of me, but what I do advocate about the book is the way he structures things. Its silly that it seems SO obvious, but if something is not the way you think, then its very unlikely one day you will just "think" differently unless some more information comes in! Anyway, I am glad you are here and sharing and asking questions!!
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Happy966
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Post by Happy966 on Feb 2, 2012 15:05:00 GMT -5
Even though I am only 5 months out, I would say a lot of what Brandilynn said is true for me. My thinker is broken around food, and I do not make wise decisions about food - especially when I am hungry. And I was hungry all the time before surgery, in the panicked, hysterical way she talks about. I never *lost* my hunger, but it is much more manageable. I am sure I will feel it more as time goes on, but I hope it is never what it was, and that I can be satisfied with less food than before surgery.
I spent 26 years in Overeaters Anonymous, lost and maintained a lot of weight, gained it back, then lost the same 50 pounds 3 times. What I could see was at the end of the day, the hunger always got the best of me, and my ability to put away 2 pounds of food at the Chinese buffet would start the cycle all over again. I am hoping I can learn to live on a normal amount of food, and that my sleeve will at least be somewhat of a safety net for mass quantity eating.
Edited to add: I don't follow a "diet" but I do follow a food plan. I still feel like a food addict and rely every day on what I learned in OA to navigate my way around food. I abstain from or avoid what I can't control.
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Post by Carolyn H. on Feb 2, 2012 18:04:34 GMT -5
I have a lot of restriction, and right now, I have no hunger. My hunger may be impacted by the thyroid issues I'm having, so that remains to be seen. If it does, the 'trying to eat enough to stop losing weight' thing might be a smidge less of a chore than it is right now.
I think a lot of its about building habits. One of my old habits was noshing while talking on the phone both at work and at home. I spend a lot of time on calls often bored nearly to tears but I '_HAVE_ to be on the call for one reason or another. That habit is broken. I've built better habits like planning my food, measuring it out, and eating small portions. Another good habit is taking mental health breaks to walk at work etc.
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Janis
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Post by Janis on Feb 2, 2012 18:10:15 GMT -5
Happy,
Yes, I think I too will always have a special relationship with food. I have changed my eating habits a lot but as I improve my aging body needs less food. I remember the mass quantities I consumed as a teen and certainly don't eat that much now although I weigh about the same as I did in high school.
Janis
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Post by Janis on Feb 2, 2012 18:15:17 GMT -5
Carolyn,
I like to eat in front of the television. Not just snack while watching TV but I prefer my meal while it is on. I try to eat without it and when I do I think I eat slower and consume less overall but it is a hard habit to break.
Janis
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Post by loulou7 on Feb 2, 2012 18:30:33 GMT -5
The idea of not keeping trigger foods in the house, or in easy reach, is great. I already know there are certain foods that I will grab and eat, even if I'm not hungry, even if I wasn't even thinking about them five minutes ago, even if I just finished my meal.
So if I can't see them or know where I hid them (did anyone else every do this?), I can't just mindlessly grab and eat. And then grab another one in five minutes.....on and on until the whole package is gone.
No trigger foods in the house, and because I'm too lazy to actually go to the store just to buy an impulse food, I can usually wait out the impulse. But I've realized that at work sometimes I have to stay out of the break room on the days when people bring goodies to share, because once I get started nibbling, I'm likely to keep going back the rest of the day.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 2, 2012 19:39:59 GMT -5
The idea of not keeping trigger foods in the house, or in easy reach, is great. I already know there are certain foods that I will grab and eat, even if I'm not hungry, even if I wasn't even thinking about them five minutes ago, even if I just finished my meal. So if I can't see them or know where I hid them (did anyone else every do this?), I can't just mindlessly grab and eat. And then grab another one in five minutes.....on and on until the whole package is gone. No trigger foods in the house, and because I'm too lazy to actually go to the store just to buy an impulse food, I can usually wait out the impulse. But I've realized that at work sometimes I have to stay out of the break room on the days when people bring goodies to share, because once I get started nibbling, I'm likely to keep going back the rest of the day. This is my issue & why cheese curls pre-op were relegated to once or twice a year, while on a vacation.. if any were left (never happened!) they'd be pitched as we pack out. Same deal for chips & salsa. I can't have trigger foods in the house, and for me, they are sometimes as innocuous as cream cheese.. which I DO have in the house in those mini-serving tubs.. and I know it's there.. but I avoid it as I will want all of them and not just one. Snacky stuff that I allow myself to keep in the house still needs to be out of sight in a cabinet.. like pork rinds and protein wafers/bars.. They really do push me into the mindset to eat more.. or go back again and again.
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Post by loulou7 on Feb 2, 2012 19:46:54 GMT -5
Yeah, I had to stop buying those Carb Smart ice cream bars because I would eat the entire box of bars in one evening, just going back again and again until the last bar was gone.
No willpower at all.....none.
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Post by pinklyfe on Feb 4, 2012 23:54:34 GMT -5
I'm a newbie here and after reading this thread. Im seeing another side to this WLS. I'm reading things I haven't read before over at OH or verticalsleevetalk. Most of the threads I read are "eating is a chore" Or "it doesnt take much to make me feel full" I can eat 3 good size meals a day plus graze from one meal to the next. I'm like loulou. No willpower. Am I wrong to think that hunger will be curbed significally when I get sleeved? It will. Right?
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Post by TooFatForTooLong on Feb 5, 2012 0:22:52 GMT -5
While I still have major restriction going on, I was able to over-eat as early as one month post-op: I could easily eat a pint of ice cream - with all the fat and sugar etc. and very little nutritional value.
So even though I cannot eat too much at once of most foods, there are many ways that I can sabotage my weight-loss. I like sweet drinks, how much sugar and empty calories do those have?
My point is that restriction has its restrictions too.
The reason I don't overeat is because I didn't risk my life having surgery to remain as unhealthy as I was. I didn't risk my life having surgery to lose weight "easily." I risked my life having surgery because it was the only tool I could think of that would help me regain my health. I constantly remind myself that surgery is only a tool - like a shovel that won't dig a hole on its own, you have to work the tool. I didn't risk my life getting that tool to leave it in the closet and not use it.
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nextchapter
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Post by nextchapter on Feb 5, 2012 1:23:37 GMT -5
This was a fantastic topic. I will save and read again in a few months.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 5, 2012 9:27:16 GMT -5
I'm a newbie here and after reading this thread. Im seeing another side to this WLS. I'm reading things I haven't read before over at OH or verticalsleevetalk. Most of the threads I read are "eating is a chore" Or "it doesnt take much to make me feel full" I can eat 3 good size meals a day plus graze from one meal to the next. I'm like loulou. No willpower. Am I wrong to think that hunger will be curbed significally when I get sleeved? It will. Right? it probably will, at least temporarily. I did experience hunger from 1 week post op but ONE sip of broth - literally one sip - and I think felt FULL. long term I always hoped to have hunger and most do. the eating as a chore thing I also never had - but I didn't feel the need to be choking down "real" food because some doctor told me it's better to get protein from food than protein drinks. for along time, most food didn't appeal so I drank my Syntrax Nectars and didn't worry about it. the first weeks & months are very different from further out. happily! as I like being a person who experiences hunger and can eat more than a tiny amount.
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Janis
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Post by Janis on Feb 5, 2012 12:27:54 GMT -5
My way of shopping has definately changed. I seldom buy processed foods like potato chips and when I do, I realize again why I don't buy them regularly. I tend to shop the outter edges of the store and leave out the middle isles where the cookies, chips and other good stuff is found.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 5, 2012 14:15:16 GMT -5
I'm a newbie here and after reading this thread. Im seeing another side to this WLS. I'm reading things I haven't read before over at OH or verticalsleevetalk. Most of the threads I read are "eating is a chore" Or "it doesnt take much to make me feel full" I can eat 3 good size meals a day plus graze from one meal to the next. I'm like loulou. No willpower. Am I wrong to think that hunger will be curbed significally when I get sleeved? It will. Right? it probably will, at least temporarily. I did experience hunger from 1 week post op but ONE sip of broth - literally one sip - and I think felt FULL. long term I always hoped to have hunger and most do. the eating as a chore thing I also never had - but I didn't feel the need to be choking down "real" food because some doctor told me it's better to get protein from food than protein drinks. for along time, most food didn't appeal so I drank my Syntrax Nectars and didn't worry about it. the first weeks & months are very different from further out. happily! as I like being a person who experiences hunger and can eat more than a tiny amount. 2nding this! I lost hunger for maybe 4months? Now I get it, not every day, but some days.. and some days I am hungry all the time, every 2-3 hrs. Some never lose hunger at all. The body adapts, hunger usually returns to one degree or another.. and many of us didn't always eat because of physical hunger cues. I'm very fond of saying that all this surgery gave me was a helping hand to not eat as much quantity as I had in the past.. that's all. It's still up to me to mind my eating, choose the right stuff and watch out for my behavior patterns that got me to the point of needing surgery to begin with. I appreciate the help, but it's still mostly on me to do the work, especially the mental side which is the biggest of all.
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Janis
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Post by Janis on Feb 5, 2012 15:20:25 GMT -5
It sounds like the long term people are saying that the surgery gave you the ability to lose but learned skills and hard work is keeping it off. I would think that any surgery to the digestive system would bring on a reduced intake and resulting weight loss until fully recovered.
I keep thinking maybe I can go straight to the mental part and skip the surgery. I thought I had it in hand; I guess I do to some degree. If I was holding steady I'd be OK but it is the creeping upward that has me scarred.
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Post by reinventingangela on Feb 5, 2012 16:28:29 GMT -5
I really like this post and thank you to all who have given their input here. I think Im going to create a similar post on the DS thread because Id like the same sort of candid responses from those folks since Im pretty sure Id just wreck the VSG lol Hope you guys dont mind and again, thanks for the input!
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Post by Deleted on Feb 5, 2012 16:59:32 GMT -5
It sounds like the long term people are saying that the surgery gave you the ability to lose but learned skills and hard work is keeping it off. I would think that any surgery to the digestive system would bring on a reduced intake and resulting weight loss until fully recovered. I keep thinking maybe I can go straight to the mental part and skip the surgery. I thought I had it in hand; I guess I do to some degree. If I was holding steady I'd be OK but it is the creeping upward that has me scarred. I wanted to address this, since I was there once. I lost from 308 to 155 about 15 years ago, over less than 2 years time. I maintained in the 168-175 range for about 5 years. Those were very, VERY hard years to maintain. My bottomless pit was never satisfied, and eventually after a traumatic life event, I put my head in the sand and ignored my health until it was out of control again. I *could* lose weight, maybe not like I had 15 years ago, single, and living at the gym.. but I knew I couldn't maintain that loss with the anatomy I was born with.. It is very hard to hold onto a large loss like that when your body, your stomach, hormones etc are all crying out for more food. That's why I decided I needed surgery, not necessarily just to lose, but to have assistance maintaining. I had the tools and the knowledge, but my body wouldn't let me use them on a regular basis. I now feel satisfied, and my raging hunger (be it mental or physical, or very likely a combo) has been reduced to a more sane hunger.. one that gives me some time to ponder and make the best call far more often than I ever could. If I were smart, and this surgery was around 15 years ago, knowing what I know now.. I would have had it as a lightweight and saved myself from regaining almost everything I lost all those years ago. Not trying to push your thoughts in one way or another, as only you know you.. but I thought I had it once, only to see it slide away, and the best I could do prior to surgery was stop the regain and try to stop the yo-yoing and just maintain for a while. I knew if I attempted another huge loss, the hunger would ramp up until I started the gain cycle again.
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Post by pinklyfe on Feb 13, 2012 22:36:16 GMT -5
Love, love this thread. How did you guys get into my head? I think, I'm really going to have to persuade and gain support from my husband. To not buy the snacky junk food he buys. Bit of background. Hubby is apart of the 2% of the population that no matter what he eats, if too much, his metabolism revs up and burns it off.ive known him for 30 yrs and he has stayed the same 140-145 lbs. i out weigh him!! He has not so steller eating habits. IE: cookies for breakfast. He goes to the grocery store once a week to pick up food items. He picks up those individual snacks from ritz, Mr salty, Oreos, chips ahoy, etc. who do you think eats the carb crap? Me. This thread makes me feel I really need to have him stop. I've asked before. He stops for awhile then the food comes back into the house and I throw my hands in the air
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Post by Deleted on Feb 13, 2012 22:54:03 GMT -5
Love, love this thread. How did you guys get into my head? I think, I'm really going to have to persuade and gain support from my husband. To not buy the snacky junk food he buys. Bit of background. Hubby is apart of the 2% of the population that no matter what he eats, if too much, his metabolism revs up and burns it off.ive known him for 30 yrs and he has stayed the same 140-145 lbs. i out weigh him!! He has not so steller eating habits. IE: cookies for breakfast. He goes to the grocery store once a week to pick up food items. He picks up those individual snacks from ritz, Mr salty, Oreos, chips ahoy, etc. who do you think eats the carb crap? Me. This thread makes me feel I really need to have him stop. I've asked before. He stops for awhile then the food comes back into the house and I throw my hands in the air You're going to have to take responsibility for what you put in your mouth. He's not force feeding you. Even IF he really does stop bring that stuff into the house, it's still going to be out there, and the only one putting stuff in your mouth is you. I am sorry to sound harsh, but that is the reality of it. You have to wrap yourself 100% around the responsibility. No more excuses. No more finger pointing. YOU make the choices. If YOU choose to put junk in your mouth, then own it. The most profound exercise I learned to do in therapy, which resulted in YEARS of stuff to work on at a year-round, twice a week schedule, was to finish the sentence, "I am eating in order to...." whenever I wanted to put food in my mouth. I learned WHY I was feeding my face, and it was damned hard stuff to deal with. But deal with it I did, and there came a time when it was dealt with and I was ready to make changes. A door opened for me to move forward with WLS. I discovered the DS and never looked back. From there it took something like a year to get to the operating room. I firmly believe that if you are someone who believes herself to be emotionally or psychologically out of control in some way with eating--and passing the buck like you're doing here is a big red flag to me that this is the case--it's pointless to have any kind of WLS until you've done the healing work necessary to make yourself willing and ABLE to take responsibility.
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